


no need to cry

by sxetia



Category: Nana (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Angst, F/F, First Person Perspective, Hurt/Comfort, Implied One-Sided Relationship - Freeform, Internal Monologue, Second Person Perspective, Yearning, i hate these homosexuals, inner monologue, this show is gonna kill me physically
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-26
Updated: 2020-01-26
Packaged: 2021-02-27 10:35:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 573
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22415587
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sxetia/pseuds/sxetia
Summary: things left unsaid.
Relationships: Osaki Nana & Komatsu Nana, Osaki Nana/Komatsu Nana
Comments: 8
Kudos: 26





	no need to cry

I remember whenever I first set my eyes on you. You looked so full of life and optimistic — I thought you were just dumb, some naive girl who hadn’t seen the worst the world had to offer. 

I guess in a few ways I was right, huh? It was stupid of me to try and assume everything about you just from a look, but you also hadn’t weathered the most rotten of what would come yet. 

Whenever I learned what you had been going through and what all the others had done to you, it enraged me. I wanted to fight back against anybody who would dare to hurt you. 

You struck a chord in my heart whenever I was trying my best to make it stop beating. I didn’t really know why at the time. Maybe I still don’t know, but I think I might have an idea. 

Now, look at you... you look so tired, and so broken on the inside and outside alike. Everything is reaching out to sink its fingers into you all at once, because the world can’t let any good thing go uncorrupted. 

You remind me of myself before I learned how to fake it. I see the look in your eye, the fear and the sadness. The pain. 

You are so weak, because you haven’t had the chance to grow strong yet. And here I am, selfishly wanting to protect you from everything and deny you that chance. 

It makes sense, doesn’t it? I’ve always wanted to keep you safe, and to make sure you never had to go through everything I might have. But I’m not strong enough to even keep myself from getting hurt. Maybe some of my pain seeps through my skin and hurts you, too. I’ve never had anything this special to me before or anybody I felt so strongly about, so it’s a little uncomfortable and new to me and I fuck it up. 

All because I want to see that innocent smile again, and to see that dreamer’s gaze in your eyes. I know it can’t ever come back, that it’s been beaten out of you by the people around you. 

Including me. 

You’re becoming a stronger, wiser person now, and it makes me upset. Because I feel like I’m losing the Hachi that I want to know. It’s selfish, and I’m not strong enough to not be hurt by the fact that I can’t force you to keep your innocence. Maybe I’m trying to force you there to compensate for what I never had.

Maybe I want a Hachi that’s easier to love, and safer for me to love. 

Hey, Hachi...? 

I know I’m not perfect, or strong, or even good at being the person you need me to be. But I promise that I’ll never leave. Even if you aren’t willing or ready to accept me... I’m not going to give up on you, or my childish dreams of protecting you, ever. 

So just know that if you ever feel alone, or you feel like nobody understands how badly you’re hurting, or even if you just need somebody to hold you and tell you it’ll be okay...

Just remember me. No matter how far away we seem from one another or what happens to us, if you need somebody, or feel like you’re ready to trust again, just remember me. 

And until then... I’m here waiting for you.

**Author's Note:**

> at the point in the show where Hachi finally fucking breaks, and it’s gotten me so messed up that I had to write a little vent fic just as a treat to myself. I want them to be happy so bad. 
> 
> working song lyrics into my writing is my vice.


End file.
